Guys, I have that in a chain email, is this true? Because if all this is absolutely true, I become a nun.
1. If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.
2. Get to work the toilet seat. If he returns, he asked.
3. Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys marry is the fear that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you're stuck with it.
4. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect gift yet again!
5. If you ask a question you do not want the answer to, expect an answer you do not want to hear.
6. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Living with her.
7. Do not ask us what we think that if you're willing to discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation or monster trucks.
8. Sunday Sports =. It's like the full moon or the changing tides. Let it be.
9. Shopping is not a sport, and no, we're never going to think this way.
10. When we go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear it well. Really.
11. You have enough clothes.
12. You have too many shoes.
13. Crying is blackmail.
14. Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.
15. Ask what you want. Let's be clear about this: subtle hints do not work. With advice does not work. Tips obvious does not work. Suffice it to say!
16. No, we do not know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
17. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult. We are forced to miss sometimes.
18. Most guys own three pairs of shoes. What makes you think that we would be choosing the right pair, out of thirty, would go well with your dress.
19. Yes and No are perfectly good answers to almost every question.
20. Come see us with a problem only if you want help solving it. This is what we do. Sympathy is what girlfriends are for.
21. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. Go see a doctor.
22. Foreign films are foreign.
23. Check your oil.
24. Do not pretend. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.
25. It is neither in your best interest nor ours to take the quiz together.
26. No, it does not matter quiz.
27. Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments are null and void after 7 days.
28. If you do not dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, do not expect us to act like soap opera guys.
29. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other.
30. Let us Ogle. We'll watch anyway. It is genetic.
31. Do not rub the lamp if you do not want to leave engineering.
32. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want to do, but not both.
33. Whenever possible, please say what you have to say during commercials.
34. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, neither do we.
35. blouses Wonderbra Women who wear low-cut and lose their right to complain about having their breasts looked.
36. More women should were Wonderbra and low cut blouses. We love watching breasts.
37. The relationship will never be like it was the first two months we went out.
38. ALL men see only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach is a fruit, not a color.
39. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
40. If it itches, it will be scratched.
41. Beer is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
42. If this is OUR house, I do not understand why My Business is thrown into the closet / attic / basement.
Posted on March 4, 2010.
